The Four Word Film Review Fourum
Home | Profile | Register | Active Topics | Members | Search | FAQ
Username:
Password:
Save Password
Forgot your Password?

Return to my fwfr
Frequently Asked Questions Click for advanced search
 All Forums
 FWFR Related
 Reviews
 your opinions on this review please....
 New Topic  Reply to Topic
 Send Topic to a Friend
 Printer Friendly
Author Previous Topic Topic Next Topic  

boydegg 
"Creator of Grammarman comic."

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  06:07:45  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hi all

I've just had a review (one I was quite proud of) rejected for the second time.

I fully accept the MERP's decision on this - if they don't like it, they don't like it, and that's final. But I was so certain it would not only get accepted, but also scoop a lot of votes ... maybe it's just me though.

Please tell me honestly if you'd also decline this review, and if so - why?

(note: both times it was rejected, no explanation was given, so I don't know why it was turned down)

The film: 'Charlotte's Web'

My review: "Spider-ham."

I thought it was simple and cute. It covers the film fine ... Charlotte is a spider and Wilbur is a pig (ham) ... and it sounds like Spider-man, which just appealed to my own crappy sense of fun/humour. Even if the spider-ham/spider-man pun doesn't work, the spider and pig reference ought to be enough on its own .... or am I wrong?

Tell me honestly what you think.

Boydegg



ChocolateLady 
"500 Chocolate Delights"

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  06:18:07  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I think the idea is a good one, its just not developed enough.

Just a thought - what if you tried something like: "Charlotte, Wilbur=Spider, Ham!" Or perhaps "Wilber: Charlotte's spider-ham".

Worth giving a try.
Go to Top of Page

Sean 
"Necrosphenisciform anthropophagist."

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  06:43:24  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
This might be fixable with punctuation. "Spider-ham" suggests that the ham (the pig) is described as a "spider pig". Does that make sense? What's a "spider pig"? If by the review you just mean that the movie contains a spider and a pig, and want it to coincidentally sound a bit like "Spiderman" , then perhaps the way to do it would be "Spider, ham". Or something like it. The hyphen you used makes it somewhat incorrect, IMO.

Often when a review is declined, it pays to really dissect it, i.e., what exactly does it say if you read it literally? If you remove the joke or gag from the review, does it still make sense and make a correct statement?

So, if I was you I would remove the hyphen and puncutate so that there is nothing incorrect about it.

Edit: You could argue that it's correct the way you wrote it if the pig is somehow a possession of, or attached to the spider (haven't seen the movie, but read the book 30 years ago ). E.g., if the pig is an employee (or something) of the spider then you could argue that the hyphen is OK.

Edited by - Sean on 06/09/2006 06:49:38
Go to Top of Page

boydegg 
"Creator of Grammarman comic."

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  07:56:25  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

Thanks for the advice, guys!

I've resubmitted three versions of it, with the tweaks you've advised. If it still gets rejected this time, I'll let that one die!



Go to Top of Page

Stalean 
"Back...OMG"

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  14:15:44  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I know you have already resubbed, boydegg, but if all do get rejected again, you might try "Spider/Ham." Just a thought.

Edited by - Stalean on 06/09/2006 14:17:05
Go to Top of Page

TitanPa 
"Here four more"

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  15:37:19  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Im fonda the review.
Go to Top of Page

boydegg 
"Creator of Grammarman comic."

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  15:40:22  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Actually, it's strange how punctuation suddenly takes on so much more importance and meaning when you're working within the confines of a four word limit!

Go to Top of Page

RockGolf 
"1500+ reviews. 1 joke."

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  15:46:36  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I just had a rejection for the musical version of Web from the 70's. The "may sing" spider ma'am.[9]

I'd say I earned that rejection.
Go to Top of Page

Face 
"four words never backwards"

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  16:47:42  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by boydegg



The film: 'Charlotte's Web'

My review: "Spider-ham."

I thought it was simple and cute. It covers the film fine ... Charlotte is a spider and Wilbur is a pig (ham) ... and it sounds like Spider-man, which just appealed to my own crappy sense of fun/humour. Even if the spider-ham/spider-man pun doesn't work, the spider and pig reference ought to be enough on its own .... or am I wrong?

Tell me honestly what you think.

Boydegg







Well, I have to say, I thought I'd seen my fwfr colleague boydegg sink as low as he could get until this thinly-veiled attempt to catch sympathy votes for his frankly feeble 'Spiderham'...I mean, we could all play at that game, couldn't we?

I, for one, though, will not sink to such levels of blatant attention-seeking. I could, if I was a less principled fwfr , draw attention to my recently rejected - but to my mind quite brilliant - review of the first Harry Potter flick: 'Voldemort occupieS QUIRREL'S NUT' and how it wounded my very soul to have it discarded without a word of explanation, in the hope that someone out there would think 'Well, I can't abandon a fellow fwfr in his hour of need - what kind of monster would that make me?'

I could stoop to these levels, but I - FACE, the author of such recent, un-voted wonders as 'Robert Don Niro' for Godfather II or 'Natalie fakes passPort, man' for Closer - will not embrace such lowly, transparent efforts to garner more votes.

After all, this would make me nothing more than a common whore, wouldn't it?
Go to Top of Page

boydegg 
"Creator of Grammarman comic."

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  18:07:48  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

Heh heh heh - the irony is, he IS a whore in real life! Well ... rent boy, but they're the same thing, aren't they?

Go to Top of Page

Montgomery 
"F**k!"

Posted - 06/09/2006 :  19:14:34  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
quote:
Originally posted by Face

quote:
Originally posted by boydegg



The film: 'Charlotte's Web'

My review: "Spider-ham."

I thought it was simple and cute. It covers the film fine ... Charlotte is a spider and Wilbur is a pig (ham) ... and it sounds like Spider-man, which just appealed to my own crappy sense of fun/humour. Even if the spider-ham/spider-man pun doesn't work, the spider and pig reference ought to be enough on its own .... or am I wrong?

Tell me honestly what you think.

Boydegg







Well, I have to say, I thought I'd seen my fwfr colleague boydegg sink as low as he could get until this thinly-veiled attempt to catch sympathy votes for his frankly feeble 'Spiderham'...I mean, we could all play at that game, couldn't we?

I, for one, though, will not sink to such levels of blatant attention-seeking. I could, if I was a less principled fwfr , draw attention to my recently rejected - but to my mind quite brilliant - review of the first Harry Potter flick: 'Voldemort occupieS QUIRREL'S NUT' and how it wounded my very soul to have it discarded without a word of explanation, in the hope that someone out there would think 'Well, I can't abandon a fellow fwfr in his hour of need - what kind of monster would that make me?'

I could stoop to these levels, but I - FACE, the author of such recent, un-voted wonders as 'Robert Don Niro' for Godfather II or 'Natalie fakes passPort, man' for Closer - will not embrace such lowly, transparent efforts to garner more votes.

After all, this would make me nothing more than a common whore, wouldn't it?



Your review for Closer is wrong. She didn't fake her Passport. That is her real name. The fake name is the one she gives to Law. Watch the movie again.

So, your review, if it has been approved, should be rejected because it's wrong.

Sorry, but true.

EM :)

Go to Top of Page

boydegg 
"Creator of Grammarman comic."

Posted - 06/10/2006 :  18:04:39  Show Profile  Reply with Quote

Yes!!!!! Got it in this time!

Thanks for the help, guys.

Boydegg

Go to Top of Page
  Previous Topic Topic Next Topic  
 New Topic  Reply to Topic
 Send Topic to a Friend
 Printer Friendly
Jump To:
The Four Word Film Review Fourum © 1999-2024 benj clews Go To Top Of Page
Snitz Forums 2000