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BaftaBaby 
"Always entranced by cinema."
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 Posted - 11/19/2008 : 09:58:31
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Max Payne http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0467197/
Let's play Spot the Singers. Well, right there center-screen and in nearly every scene is the eponymous Marky Mark. Then we have rapper Ludacris - playing the equally ludicrous Detective Bravura. And let's not forget Nelly Furtado as a grieving widow spitting out venom into Max's face. I may have missed someone. Apologies.
But look - isn't that Chris O'Donnell? Must have been a slow day at Grey's Anatomy, because there's his TV co-star Kate Burton, too. Well I guess an actor always needs some extra cash to "put food on his family" in the words of some prez or other. And here's the very talented Beau Bridges bringing as much dimension to the 2-D cartoon of a retired cop now Head of Security of a GIANT drugs firm. You know he's important because he can order a helicopter to meet him on the roof.
It's director John Moore bringing all these together in an adaptation of a best-selling vid game. Well, you need a star or five to take your mind off the fact there's no story to speak of, no characters, nothing that qualifies as dialogue. For further relief Moore also supplies his stylist's eye and the film looks terrific. Not as artsy as Volckmnan's Renaissance, but beautifully shot and sharply edited.
It's a winter-in-NYC flick with lotsa snow. Lots. And yet you can't see the breath of anyone. Have you noticed that? And when people come in from the cold to a room so warm the guy inside's wearing a sleeveless undershirt, they never register the temperature change. Gee, folks, that's acting ... bad acting!
So you can prob'ly tell by now that if a person's noticing these details they may not be entirely engrossed by the bigger picture.
Once upon a time I used to write reports for Columbia and later for Sony when they took over, on what's known as the video sell-through market. That means I advised them whether to stock certain titles for their catalog of VHS sales. The vast majority were - well, not so much documentaries as snippets of golf shots, or skiing downhill being chased by an avalanche but no commentary. I'm not kidding. One of these was a series of shots of ladies in bikinis and stiletto heels holding, aiming, fondling uzi machine guns.
I mention this because Max Payne is nearly as gun obsessed as that vid. OK I'm not the target market, that's a given. But you know when I bemoan the tendency for some stories to cast women either in the role of domestic or victim or hooker, I really don't believe the alternative must be a heavy-lidded chick toting a gun that would likely put Van Damme's shoulder out it's so heavy. And when she says to Payne, "You know what I do for a living," well, all I can see is you speak softly and carry a big gun. And lurk a lot. And get mad at your little sister, who will grow up to go out with James Bond.
Action. Oh, yes, there's action. There's emotionally damaged Max striding through lotsa snow and getting into scrapes, the rascal, and getting out of them. And trying to claw his life back from this very boring movie which will undoubtedly make him even richer than he already is.
Did I mention there are evil angels?
Ba-BOOM!
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ChocolateLady 
"500 Chocolate Delights"
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Posted - 11/19/2008 : 10:25:31
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quote:
Originally posted by BaftaBabe
And trying to claw his life back from this very boring movie which will undoubtedly make him even richer than he already is.
Bwahahahhahahahahahah! But you know, if this is even half as bad as you describe it, he'll need every penny he can get since he won't see any serious scripts in a good long while after this disaster!
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Demisemicenturian
"Four ever European"
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Posted - 11/19/2008 : 10:44:11
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| Yep, it's not good. Let's pretend this is a spoiler: The name of the drugs company spells it out loud and clear from early on that they are involved. |
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demonic
"Cinemaniac"
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Posted - 11/19/2008 : 13:25:52
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| As if "The Happening" wasn't a large enough nail in the coffin... it's a real shame, I was looking forward to this one. I played the game years ago and loved it, and thought the angel imagery in the trailer was a mite confusing but beautiful. What a waste. |
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MisterBadIdea 
"PLZ GET MILK, KTHXBYE"
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Posted - 11/19/2008 : 16:15:12
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It's Sin City, but boring.
Jesus, since when have video game movies been BORING? Stupid, unwatchable, pathetically written, insulting, painful on the eyes -- yes, absolutely. But boring??
Wahlberg is best playing pissy assholes (The Basketball Diaries, The Departed) or doofy dumb guys (Boogie Nights, Rock Star, even The Happening). But he makes a terrible Vin Diesel. Sometimes he is just the most boring human being on the planet.
Where the hell is our Sin City sequel? The Spirit is not going to cut it. |
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duh 
"catpurrs"
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Posted - 11/22/2008 : 00:33:27
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quote:
Originally posted by MisterBadIdea
It's Sin City, but boring.
Where the hell is our Sin City sequel? The Spirit is not going to cut it.
Speaking of Sin City...on this fourum, I was less than enthusiastic after seeing it for the first time. Then I saw it again and liked it a little better.
I saw it again recently, and WOW. Now I "get it." It is all about the art! (Yeah, I can be kinda slow on the uptake.) |
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Mr Savoir Faire
"^ Click my name. "
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Posted - 11/24/2008 : 19:59:20
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I haven't seen this film yet.
I will say that I am a huge fan of the game though. The games' plot paralleled Norse mythology and had hundreds of symbols in it.
Also, the game was dark as hell. I decided not to see this movie when I found out it was rated pg-13.
I saw the trailer long ago and I couldn't help but notice that there was little Norse imagery. It looked more like Christian to me. without giving spoilers, although I'm pretty sure what happens in this movie, could someone confirm this?
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Airbolt 
"teil mann, teil maschine"
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Posted - 11/25/2008 : 00:17:51
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I was talking to the DVD shop assistant about films adapted from Videogames the other day. They haven't got a very good track record and from this review MAX PAYNE is no exception.
Videogames are fun to play but how often have you watched someone playing one?
BTW if they want ideas for videogames/comic based films heres a couple
CRIMSON SKIES - a fantastic 1930's flying adventure set in an alternative USA which dissolved into squabbling regions after the Depression. The plot is pure 1930's serials and involves gallant rogues battling air pirates, zeppelins and the British rulers of Hawaii ( Brits as the villains ? - go figure! ). It would make a fantastic film if it managed to capture the swashbuckling nature of the game. Think the Rocketeer or that Jude Law flick ( only better! ) with a touch of the Indiana Jones and a soupcon of Tales of the Gold Monkey
TEAM ZERO - A graphic novel about a group of US commando raiders put together from a bunch of maladjusted misfits. Hold on, i hear you say , isn't that the Dirty Dozen? Well, sort of. This rip roaring tale of a snatch raid on Peenemunde that goes south is so cinematic it just begs to be filmed. The first third of the film would be taken up with the characters being intoduced ( it's the usual suspects - mad demolitions man, cool sniper, nutjob and so on ).Then theres the raid that goes wrong as the soviet forces arrive in search of the rocket guys. Finally theres a tense "last stand" where loyalties are questioned and the US team hold off a superior soviet force in a last ditch Alamo style. Then , after all that , theres a HUGE twist.
I'm not on commission for either! |
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demonic
"Cinemaniac"
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Posted - 11/25/2008 : 00:50:48
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"Crimson Skies" was a fun game and it was overtly cinematic in its style and reference points - so you're right it would make a straightforward step to the screen.
I'm surprised they've not made a "Half-Life" game yet given what is being made; probably the most absorbing and thrilling game experience I've had, although it was a clear influence on "Cloverfield" in some respects.
I'd quite like a "Secret of Monkey Island" movie too. Animated of course. |
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demonic
"Cinemaniac"
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Posted - 11/26/2008 : 02:57:44
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Ok, now I've seen Max Payne I can state fairly happily I didn't think it the disaster previously noted in this thread - far from it. It's not a great movie, obviously, but it was perfectly decent given it started life as a computer game (a very good one at that), and the track record of such things doesn't really bear repeating. Off the top of my head I can't think of a more stylishly done or relatively adult take on a computer game title than this one.
Mark Wahlberg is pretty awful - he's starting to redefine Keanu like wooden-ness, so much so that Keanu must be breathing a sigh of relief; the plot is paper thin and about as transparent as paper too, but I still liked it. I certainly liked it a lot more than "Quantum of Solace", but I suspect I'll be a minority on that one.
It looked great- the design and cinematography were strong, it was never confusing or over-edited to make it seem more exciting that it was (in fact it wasn't particularly exciting at all apart from a couple of half decent but very short action set-pieces), but I never found it boring like MBI.
To confirm to Mister SF - the Norse mythology from the game is intact... the angels seen in the trailer are meant to be Valkyries. They were actually one of the best things in it - the visions of an otherwordly apocalypse with winged beasts flying around was very well done (made me think of "Constantine" but was much better... I hated that movie) and added a welcome fantasy element, which never seemed out of place.
One final point, and here I agree with Baffy on this one, the childish gun fetishism was way overboard, and more than a bit irresponsible given the problems the world is currently having with children toting weapons and killing each other; this movie was a 15 certificate in the UK and concluded with a clear message that guns are still cool, you'll be tougher with a gun, preferably an automatic or a shotgun, and you'll suffer no consequences if you empty it into everyone you meet. |
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MisterBadIdea
"PLZ GET MILK, KTHXBYE"
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Posted - 11/26/2008 : 05:00:24
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Well, duh, of course it says guns are cool. Guns ARE cool. Just like smoking and underage sex are cool. And no amount of lung cancer, violent crime statistics or teen pregnancies is ever going to make those things not cool.
No one complains that Indiana Jones glorifies whips. Whips are dangerous too, you know.
I stand by my claims that this movie is boring. Looks fantastic, I'll admit, but still boring. There's a scene where Marky Mark is snooping around where he shouldn't and a big guy catches him. He looks at Mark. Mark looks back. They look at each other. They look some more. Hours pass before something happens. That's the whole movie in a nutshell. It's a lifeless corpse dropped in a snowbank on the side of the road. |
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demonic
"Cinemaniac"
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Posted - 11/26/2008 : 05:16:30
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quote:
Originally posted by MisterBadIdea
Well, duh, of course it says guns are cool. Guns ARE cool. Just like smoking and underage sex are cool. And no amount of lung cancer, violent crime statistics or teen pregnancies is ever going to make those things not cool.
I know what you're saying, but it's sort of an infantile argument. You'd probably stop thinking guns are cool if someone you know is shot, or you have one pulled on you. I'm impressed in an action movie or a thriller when guns are scary... that's what they are. We're not in the 80s any more and can take a step back from guys mowing down crims with an M60 in one hand and a bazooka in the other. The world has grown up a bit since then. I hope.
quote:
No one complains that Indiana Jones glorifies whips. Whips are dangerous too, you know.
As far as I know whips haven't been killing people much of late, and they're not the first choice for teen gangs either. Silly really, I think they'd look a lot cooler with fedoras and whips rather than hoods, bum-bearing baggy jeans and the ubiquitous street limp.
quote:
I stand by my claims that this movie is boring. Looks fantastic, I'll admit, but still boring. There's a scene where Marky Mark is snooping around where he shouldn't and a big guy catches him. He looks at Mark. Mark looks back. They look at each other. They look some more. Hours pass before something happens. That's the whole movie in a nutshell. It's a lifeless corpse dropped in a snowbank on the side of the road.
Yep, you're right there, but in essence this film was sold wrong; it isn't really an action movie, it's more of a crime/fantasy thriller. I think if you expected Die Hard 5: Die to the Max it'll fall short. |
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Max Payne
