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Airbolt 
"teil mann, teil maschine"
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 Posted - 01/22/2007 : 22:55:59
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95% of what you hear from your fellow cinema goers is forgettable consisting of
- Gimme Dat Popcorn
- Gimme Dat Coke
- which one's John Wayne?
- isn't she a lesbian , why is she kissing Harrison Ford?
However , occasionally you get a Gem. Waaay Back i was crammed into a Shoebox-sized screening of " Where Eagles Dare " with a lot of noisy 10 year olds. Richard and Clint were chopping down Nazis with relish and inexhaustible Bullets. Finding no more to shoot they laconically head off to find more. At this point a plaintive voice quavers....
" There's No Germans left ! "
Has anyone else heard a well aimed comment in their cinema? |
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BaftaBaby 
"Always entranced by cinema."
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Posted - 01/23/2007 : 10:54:55
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quote:
Originally posted by AIRBOLT
95% of what you hear from your fellow cinema goers is forgettable consisting of
- Gimme Dat Popcorn
- Gimme Dat Coke
- which one's John Wayne?
- isn't she a lesbian , why is she kissing Harrison Ford?
However , occasionally you get a Gem. Waaay Back i was crammed into a Shoebox-sized screening of " Where Eagles Dare " with a lot of noisy 10 year olds. Richard and Clint were chopping down Nazis with relish and inexhaustible Bullets. Finding no more to shoot they laconically head off to find more. At this point a plaintive voice quavers....
" There's No Germans left ! "
Has anyone else heard a well aimed comment in their cinema?
The funniest one I heard was waaaaaaaaay back in the mid-1960s at the Bleecker Street Cinema in Greenwich Village. The cinema showed a lot of sub-titled films. I forget what was playing but a woman's voice was just loud enough to disrupt the audience at various points to ask her companion, "Why did s/he do that?" "Why did they go there?" Everyone was getting pretty fed up. Then she asked "What's happening?" And someone [not me, I confess] yelled out,
"What's happening? Obviously, you're learning to read"
Well - you had to take your humor where you could find it in those days  
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ChocolateLady 
"500 Chocolate Delights"
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Posted - 01/23/2007 : 11:59:54
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I really wish I could remember all the comments my friend and I made when we went to see the 1976 version of King Kong. We ragged it so badly that by the end of the film, most of the small audience had gathered around us to listen and laugh. I do recall one bit where Kong has the girl in his hand and he pokes at her tummy area with his finger... our comment was:
"Oh... lower, lower... please, LOWER! OOOOOHHHHH!"
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Edited by - ChocolateLady on 01/23/2007 12:00:55 |
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Paddy C
"Does not compute! Lame!"
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Posted - 01/23/2007 : 13:10:15
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Not really a funny cinema comment so much as a 'lost in translation' moment..
Was watching 'There's Something About Mary' in a cinema in Paris back in the days when i was a resident. In the Champs-Elysees cinemas the big Hollywood releases are generally shown either in Version Francaise (Dubbed) or Version Originale (Original language with French subtitles). The French actually tend to favour the original, sub-titled version of foreign films, and this was no exception.
I was with a like-minded group of friends, and when Lee Evans brings the bottle of whiskey over to Mary and utters the immortal line:
"Oh I just want to get Mary drunk so I can give her a damn good rogering", the four of us burst out laughing... but no-one else in the cinema moved a muscle, even after reading the subtitles.. now, I can speak french, but to this day I couldn't tell you how the line was translated. Shame, cos it was damn funny in English! Pretty embarassing all the same...   |
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mampers11 
"Lazy Lebowski Loses Rug"
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Posted - 01/23/2007 : 15:06:13
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I remember watching LOTR with my sister in the U.S. and all I remember saying to her was, "That Hugo Weaving is gonna make a life of SciFi conventions, with him being in this and Matrix conventions"
My sister told me to shut up
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Airbolt
"teil mann, teil maschine"
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Posted - 01/23/2007 : 17:03:33
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Talking of Lost in Translation , I was staying with someone in the Netherlands and we decided to see a film . I asked what was on and was told it was " Hooray for a Couple of Fists " .
Imagine my confusion when it turned out to be " A Fistful of Dollars" |
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Beanmimo 
"August review site"
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Posted - 01/23/2007 : 17:16:51
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I was about nine years old and do not really remember the comment myself but my mother nearly always recounts it when "Watership Down" is mentioned.
At one stage General Woundwort (the toughest and nastiest Rabbit of all) is in mid fight and launches himself onto an opponent, his mouth fills the screen and it is coated with a mixture of blood and saliva, the voice of a girl about my own age rose up from behind us and said
"Mam, does that rabbit have a drinking problem?"
Not so much funny, really rather poignant actually. |
Edited by - Beanmimo on 01/24/2007 16:38:23 |
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Demisemicenturian
"Four ever European"
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Posted - 01/23/2007 : 18:07:16
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quote:
Originally posted by Beanmimo
Not so much funny, really rather poignant actually.
That is really poignant.  |
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redPen
"Because I said so!"
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Posted - 01/23/2007 : 20:47:30
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I'm not one to enjoy someone talking in a movie loud enough for everyone to hear, so I certainly don't make it a habit myself, but there were two occasions when I couldn't hold it in:
My best friend in high school and I used to frequent the $1 show in my hometown, where we watched a-few-months-old flicks for next to nothing. We went to see "Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan," a 1982 release, back in '83, and the movie's going along fine when, during a crucial battle scene, the video blanked out but the audio kept going. The whole audience moaned and complained, but no one appeared to be in the booth. Finally, someone went to get help, and the film was stopped . . . at a rather memorable moment. After the Enterprise is wounded in battle, Capt. Kirk barks "Emergency lights!" and right then, the house lights went up, and the film stopped. The audience was dead silent for a sec, then I said "Thank you, Sulu!"
The other was a few years later with the same friend. We went to see Costner's "The Untouchables." During the scene where a pleased-as-punch Elliot Ness is handing out cigars to announce the birth of his son, one character asks "What are you gonna call him?" (or so). I said rather loudly, "I think he should call it Happy." (silence for a beat) "I like the name Happy Ness!" The crowd around us laughed quite a bit, and for just a sec, I was a star!
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Paddy C
"Does not compute! Lame!"
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Posted - 01/23/2007 : 22:01:05
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quote:
Originally posted by redPen
The other was a few years later with the same friend. We went to see Costner's "The Untouchables." During the scene where a pleased-as-punch Elliot Ness is handing out cigars to announce the birth of his son, one character asks "What are you gonna call him?" (or so). I said rather loudly, "I think he should call it Happy." (silence for a beat) "I like the name Happy Ness!" The crowd around us laughed quite a bit, and for just a sec, I was a star!
Perhaps Capone's goons could then go in Pursuit of the kid in the sequel?  |
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redPen
"Because I said so!"
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Posted - 01/24/2007 : 01:15:24
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Will Smith as Ness, Jaden Smith as Happy . . . but who would play Capone? Anyone know who's "after" Will Smith? Or can they find the uncle from "Fresh Prince"? Hell, you gotta KNOW Jazzy Jeff's outta work!
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Demisemicenturian
"Four ever European"
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Posted - 01/24/2007 : 09:46:03
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quote:
Originally posted by Paddy C
quote:
Originally posted by redPen
The other was a few years later with the same friend. We went to see Costner's "The Untouchables." During the scene where a pleased-as-punch Elliot Ness is handing out cigars to announce the birth of his son, one character asks "What are you gonna call him?" (or so). I said rather loudly, "I think he should call it Happy." (silence for a beat) "I like the name Happy Ness!" The crowd around us laughed quite a bit, and for just a sec, I was a star!
Perhaps Capone's goons could then go in Pursuit of the kid in the sequel?
Weirdly, I submitted a review on this basis a few days ago.  |
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mampers11
"Lazy Lebowski Loses Rug"
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Posted - 01/24/2007 : 10:01:16
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quote:
Originally posted by redPen
Will Smith as Ness, Jaden Smith as Happy . . . but who would play Capone? Anyone know who's "after" Will Smith? Or can they find the uncle from "Fresh Prince"? Hell, you gotta KNOW Jazzy Jeff's outta work!
But Jazzy Jeff is a well respected DJ, but put him as a sidekick.
Mampers
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Paddy C
"Does not compute! Lame!"
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Posted - 01/24/2007 : 10:10:36
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quote:
Originally posted by redPen
Will Smith as Ness, Jaden Smith as Happy . . . but who would play Capone? Anyone know who's "after" Will Smith? Or can they find the uncle from "Fresh Prince"? Hell, you gotta KNOW Jazzy Jeff's outta work!
Waaait a minute, do you mean.... sort of like... 'Road to Perdition' meets 'Stomp the Yard'? 
... someone call Harvey Weinstein, we've got a movie, people!!! |
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TitanPa
"Here four more"
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Posted - 01/24/2007 : 15:09:07
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I went to see Spider-Man in theaters. When Aunt May told Peter that he wasn't Superman. Someone in the audience yelled out.
"Damn right!"
Must have been a DC Comics fan. |
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duh
"catpurrs"
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Posted - 01/24/2007 : 16:42:06
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When my husband and I went to see Gorky Park, I commented during the obligatory sex scene, "Why are the Russians worried about their birth rate? Those people aren't using birth control."
My husband answered, "Didn't you see her slip a condom onto him?" |
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Funny Comments in Cinemas
